Drew: Hello, freshmen. If you can keep your minds off fucking long enough to pay attention, I've got a few things to tell you. The time you spend here will be mostly wasted. Peals will be cast at your feet while you're busy wallowing in the mud. The reason for this is that all of you fail to grasp one solitary truth:
Drew: YOU DO NOT KNOW ANYTHING. I do not care how many honors classes you have had. I do not care about the number of citations you've received. I do not care if you edited your school newspaper. I promise you cannot even grasp the depths of your ignorance. One day soon, if you are lucky, you will finally get a glimpse of the infinitesimal worth of your knowledge and experience, and the sheer scale of it will drop you to your knees. And on that day, you'll finally realize that what you paid thousands in tuition for is not information, but HUMILITY.
Professor: Hello everyb... excuse me, what are you doing in my classroom?
Drew: Well, my work here is done.